Rhysand: Shadows and Starlight

Join us in the Therapy Tavern as we discuss the High Lord of the Night Court – Rhysand. 

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SPEAKER_00 0:00

Welcome to Dragons and Diagnoses, the podcast where we deep dive into the complex characters, tangled relationships, and emotional wreckage of your favorite fantasy worlds. We're your co-hosts, the Dragon and the Therapist.

SPEAKER_01 0:12

I'll be giving background on today's subject. And I'll be giving my professional and personal, a lot of personal, but also professional opinions based on my knowledge as a licensed therapist.

SPEAKER_00 0:24

If you haven't read Akatar, please come back after you have. There are spoilers about the series and its characters in this episode. This episode was made when six books were out. Well, five and a half. These are our thoughts based on the information available at this time.

SPEAKER_01 0:39

It is also based on the information given about the characters as we see them represented in the book. Obviously, there's always room for interpretation, and therapy and diagnosing is much more nuanced in real life.

SPEAKER_00 0:49

Our thoughts are subject to change when more books are released, and we may have episodes in the future to update our thoughts based on new information.

SPEAKER_01 0:57

Disclaimer, this podcast is intended for entertainment purposes only. It is not a substitute for professional medical or mental health advice, diagnosis, or treatment. If you have concerns about your health or well-being, please consult a qualified healthcare or mental health professional. So let's step into the therapy tavern.

SPEAKER_00 1:24

Today we're winnowing into the Night Court and taking a look at one of the most iconic romantic heroes in modern fantasy, Reese And. So buckle up, bitches, we're heading to Valaris. When we first meet Reeseand and a Court of Thorns and Roses, most of us don't like him. He's dangerous, manip manipulative, smirking at all the wrong moments. Nicole here came up with some great names for Reese when she was reading the first two books. Sure did. Why don't you tell us some of those?

SPEAKER_01 1:52

So this list uh includes but is not limited to Re-Sand Dickbag, Re Bastard, Re-Balls, Re-Asshole, and Re-Ass Wipe. Um, so yeah, for me, my first impression, literally out the gate, hated this motherfucker. Um, as you can see in in our uh our our snaps, um, I called him a cunt. I'm like, well, he's a cunt. Um, so like, yeah. So the first impression that we get is like evil, slave to amarantha, narcissistic asshole type of of thing. Um, so yeah, did not like.

SPEAKER_00 2:30

Was not impressed. I think that's the the general vibe from everyone in this fandom. From what I've seen, yeah. So it's important to remember that Ferah is being told about Reese by Tamlin and Lucian, and they do not like him at all. Fahrra can also be a bit of an unreliable narrator at times, since she is literally an illiterate 19-year-old at the beginning of the series. What we don't know at the time is that the first time we meet Reese And is actually at Calanmay. When he says, There you are, I've been looking for you. We take it as him saving Phayra from the females who wanted to take advantage of her, which in part is true. But we find out later on that he sensed that she would be there and was literally looking for her. That is true. I kind of forgot about that. Yeah, it's uh a whole faded mates nonsense. Mm-hmm. We'll sus. A little bit. We'll sus. The most beautiful man she'd ever seen, and we were like, oh, who that? And then we find out at three sand later on.

SPEAKER_01 3:32

And then he says, There you are, I've been looking for you. Yes, sign me up, please. Right. I was like, mm-hmm. I said, Oh, really? I've been looking for you too, person I've never met before.

SPEAKER_00 3:41

It was much more attractive than Tamlin. That part. Not blonde. That part. Under the mountain, he plays the part of Amarantha's favorite monster. He does her dirty work, he drugs Farah, forces bargains, toys with Tamlin. Love that. For the entire first book, we are meant to mistrust him. Since it's all from Farah's point of view, we don't really know what Reese is going through at this point, how he feels, or what he thinks of everything.

SPEAKER_01 4:09

Yes. So with that, when we are like first getting to know him, it it it is leading us into disliking him a lot. Um, because we don't know any of the background, we don't know why it's happening, all we know is what Tamil Toe and Lu Shin have been telling us of like, oh, they're the worst. Um, so yeah, so like he gets kind of a bad rap in the beginning because we don't know anything about him. Um, but the these parts where we we get to see him in the first pieces before we get to know him is like his red flag era, I would say. Yeah. Um so like manipulating her into the deal, um, because he like he was what what the fuck is the word that they use? Um the thing where I need words. Um, and of course it's not gonna come to me, was like being misleading and like intentionally leaving things out. You know what I'm talking about? Do you do you understand you get me what I'm saying, chat? Um like having like the secret things layered in there because somebody's like not paying attention. Whatever that word is, I'm gonna think about it tonight at midnight when I'm going to bed. Um, so like doing that, using her pain and like the situation that she's in, her trauma that she's experiencing to like again manipulate her into doing shit, um, promising to heal her, like taking care of her all that, um, the tattoo business so nobody else can touch her, uh, drugging her with the wine and making her basically be a stripper for him. Um after he, as we know now, saves her from Tamlin. Um, like, but he sexually assaults her. Um, and then he licks her fucking tears off her face. What is that? Yeah, that what is that? It's fucking weird. I don't care if you think that, ooh, he's gonna make you laugh. No, no, that's weird. It's very weird. That's weird. Um, and then like the helping with the lentils thing, I didn't trust it at first because like that could also be used as manipulation of like, ooh, we're gonna like I'm gonna be nice to you to like make you bond to me and like gain some trust. Yes, exactly. So our our red flag era is manipulative, he's deceitful, taking advantage of someone in a vulnerable situation. Um, again, like the trauma bonding, like doing something nice to build trust, and his lack of empathy and his lack of boundaries.

SPEAKER_00 6:33

Big lack of boundaries, big, big time. So the drug thing was to ensure Fabra didn't remember the horrors that were happening. Which, alright, I can kinda see where he's coming from. Still not okay, but you know. Reese also had her body painted so she knew where she was or wasn't touched.

SPEAKER_01 6:57

Yeah, and like that that that will come later in the segment for the green flag era. Um, but like we know after we learn about him that he was doing these things for a reason.

SPEAKER_00 7:07

Everything with Reese and everything is a strategy. Unlike Tamlin, who represents traditional fairy tale romanticism like Beauty and the Beast, Reese is morally gray. He operates in the shadows. Literally. He sacrifices his reputation and so much more for survival. He chooses to be feared and hated if it keeps his people and his loved ones safe. Tamlin didn't sacrifice much, and he was an asshole.

SPEAKER_01 7:37

Ooh, I had that one locked in load.

SPEAKER_00 7:40

That duality is the foundation of Reesan's character. Rheesan isn't just powerful, he's arguably the most powerful High Lord in Prithian. Maybe the most powerful High Lord ever to exist. His abilities include they body mind powers, winnowing, shape shifting, hello bad boy, and raw devastating magic. But this power alone doesn't define him. What truly separates Reese from the other High Lords is Valaris, the hidden city of Starlight. Valaris is arguably one of the top fantasy cities book lovers would want to visit. Yes, please. I know I would immediately go to Valaris and move into the House of Wind if given the option. Girl, like it gives you all the stuff you want.

SPEAKER_01 8:22

It delivers books to you, it cooks your food for dude. Cake, baths, smut, ADHD paradise. That's what I'm saying. Hell yeah.

SPEAKER_00 8:32

While the rest of Prithian believes the night court is all cruelty and nightmare, like the Hewn City, aka the Court of Nightmares, Reese has secretly preserved art, music, libraries, and sanctuary for centuries. He rules not through fear, but through loyalty. His inner circle, Moore, Cassian, Azreel, Namrin, aren't subordinates. They're family. And that tells us everything. He values his people and his family above all else.

SPEAKER_01 9:01

And I just had a thought come to me with kind of parts of this as we're moving into our yellow flag era. Um we see with Tamlin that he literally has like one person. He has Lucian, and that's it. That's all we see. And Reese has multiple people, multiple people that he trusts and that he works with and that trust him and like are loyal and like respect him. So like that's a that's more green flag. Um, but I just thought about it and I needed to tell you because otherwise you won't hear it again. It'll get lost in the abyss. Um, so yeah, so like that's a thing to kind of take and take into consideration there too. It's another one up on Pamelain that you know. Another point to resand, please. Thank you. So like our our yellow flag era is is the things that are not quite red flags. It's not like, oh my god, this is bad, but it's like a ooh, this is kind of this is sus, if you know what I mean. Um so like being secretive. So he didn't tell her about the mating bond. We know why he did it and it makes sense, but like he didn't tell her about it. He doesn't tell her about the issues with the baby, he doesn't tell the inner circle about making her high lady until it's like the war or something, I think is when they found out, and they're like, wait, what? What do you mean? Um, and then like the plan to sacrifice himself during the war. He didn't tell anybody that, and he was just gonna go do it. Um, like again, we understand why, but not a great choice choices. Um taking Favor from the wedding, obviously, we know that like part of that was the bond and all of the stuff, but like he literally steals her from her wedding and uses their bond to manipulate that. Um he is really overprotective in certain situations, not in the same way that we see Tamlin, where he's just overprotective, period, but like in very specific moments, and then like that's when he starts because like one of the the main things that I think Reese is built on to is choices and like giving people autonomy. But when he gets into those spaces where he he fears that the people he loves is in danger, he takes those choices from them and like he does it so that he doesn't burden them and like to protect them, and like sure, we we love you, Mr. Martyrman, but that's also kind of sus. Um, and then being hypocritical at times because again, talks about choices, talks about autonomy, and then takes that autonomy away from other people, like telling the inner circle things that could like like keeping vital information that could inform people's choices away. So like the inner circle, um a lot of the shit that he did with Nesta, like kind of manipulating her into things, Fera, and then like the the um Azriel that auto-corrected to Ariel and I almost said it. Asriel, it's not Ariel, Google Docs, thank you. Um, like Azriel and Elaine, like they they were getting cute and they were getting whatever, and he's like, absolutely not, and then told them no that they can't. So, like, why are we didn't love that? Like, and again, he kind of gives a reason of like, okay, we're trying to make Lucian our what is the word? Co-conspirator is the only thing, yes, trying to make them an ally, that's the word, yep. Um, and kind of like that, and like they're supposed to be mates and whatever, but it's also taking like it's also taking the choice away from Elaine. So there those are some of the things that are like problematic. Like, we see the reasons why, and they could be rationalized, but it's still not okay.

SPEAKER_00 12:38

No, it's still sus 50 years under Amparantha. Fuck that bitch, first of all. Yes. Fifty years of assault, manipulation, and forced cruelty. Reese endured unimaginable trauma and wore the mask of villainy to protect his people and Valaris. That mask becomes symbolic, the smirk, the arrogance, the theatrical cruelty, it's armor. And when he finally drops it with Thayra, we see underneath is it darkness like the world was led to believe. We see exhaustion, loneliness, hope. Reese Ann is a character built on survival.

SPEAKER_01 13:16

Yes. And as you're probably gonna tell in all of the later episodes of this uh podcast we're making, everybody has trauma. Yeah, every single one of them. And most of them have daddy issues. Yeah, lots of that too. So, like, what we know about Reese and his trauma is we know that his dad was a dick. Big, big, um, like misogynistic asshole guy, like your stereotypical man's man, boys don't cry type of shit. Um, and we know that he was raised mostly by his mom, I think, from from what we're up in the Illyrian Mountains. Yes. So that is kind of where we can see, um, because we'll also dive into attachment. Um that's kind of where we can see like why Reese may have turned out the way that he did, because like, yes, his dad was a dick, but he wasn't around his dad very often. And so he probably didn't have again, we're making assumptions. Um, he probably didn't have the same type of attachment and influence from dad's really shitty behavior. And he was raised by a mom who was like super in tune and taught him how to be a good person and was like, don't be like your dad. Um so we kind of see like attachment playing into that. Obviously, we know like his mother and sister were murdered by Tamlin's dad, his best friend at the time. Um, so like obviously trauma, thanks. Um, and so we can kind of see with that too of like how trauma, like the flip side of how trauma can lead people to not repeating the past. So, like with Tamlin, we kind of see he doesn't like fully repeat the past, but he's definitely still in the cycle. He's like, No, we do the tithe. Yeah. He's like, Oh, I'm not gonna be like my dad. I don't have slaves, but then like, oh, we're doing the tithe because that's just the way it's been for the last 10 billion years. Basically, slavery with extra steps. Literally that part. Um, so yeah, so Reese kind of shows us that that flip side of how someone can take their trauma and use it to break the cycle, which is interesting. Um, yeah, so the other thing that we kind of see too is it explores like healthier dynamics. I won't say the healthiest, um, but we definitely get healthier dynamics um in relationships. So, like the autonomy piece, him taking accountability for his actions and being responsible, uh, respecting Fera and her opinions and her autonomy and things like that.

SPEAKER_00 15:39

Alright, so let's talk about the shift that rocked the fandom, a court of mist and fury. This is where Reese transforms from morally ambiguous antagonist to fully realized romantic partner.

SPEAKER_01 15:52

And I'm sure this is where uh one of the snaps came in of like, they're making me like him and I don't like it. You're like, I don't know about this. I'm like, uh I'm like, I don't like this. They're making me like him and I'm mad about it. She was real mad. I'm like, I'm gonna be pissed if he's the good guy.

SPEAKER_00 16:10

I'm pretty sure you use the words I'm gonna burn this book. Maybe. Possibly, probably. So Rhysan gives Fayra choice, training, autonomy, and truth. Things that Tamil Toe would never do. He doesn't lock her in a manner for her safety. And unlike Tamlin, he definitely notices her vomiting and poor physical condition. He also doesn't silence her trauma, he doesn't make her smaller. Instead, he kneels. Literally. Resan's love language is empowerment. He teaches Fayra how to read, he teaches her how to fight and use her powers. Tamlin would never. Literally that part.

SPEAKER_01 16:51

So this is where he enters his green flag era. So again, we kind of we come back, it's gonna be broken record, coming back to autonomy and giving her choice and things like that, teaching her to read, teaching her to defend herself, empowering her to make her own choices and know that she always has a choice for the most part. Um, like when he knows that she is his mate and he doesn't force it on her, like, yes, he didn't tell her, and like in that sense, like not telling her so that way she could make her own choice and not influence it. So like that's kind of why it also falls in the yellow. Um, because like, yes, he's keeping information, but he's doing it as a means of like not influencing her. Green tinted yellow flag. Yeah, there's a little green in there. Um, I'm pretty sure I can't remember exactly, but I'm pretty sure he's like helps her process her trauma. Not in like a therapeutic sense, obviously, uh, but like has her talk about it, points it out, is like, hey buddy, you're not okay, type of a way. Um they talk through it together. Because they both endured a lot of shit under the mountain. Right, and is it I think that's where he like we also see him open up and be vulnerable, which is also a big thing, like emotional intelligence. Yeah, strong high lord. We stink. We love emotional intelligent man. Um, and then like his loyalty, obviously, and then his acknowledgement and taking accountability for his actions. Um, like he acknowledges that, like, hey, I did this shit to you under the mountain. It was really fucked up. And like, cause cause one of the things too in my research, um, a lot of people were like, Oh, he never apologizes. He never says those words. Well, like we have to think they're in a fucking fantasy world. Are they gonna say the words I'm sorry? Maybe not. That could be me being biased.

SPEAKER_00 18:47

Um, but he's gonna be like, it's gonna be okay, we'll work through this together. Right. Which he definitely did that. Yeah. Because they both were fucked up coming out of all that, and he was like, Listen, I'm here for you too. Let's work on this together. Let's be friends. Yeah. Because he just wanted to start with friendship because going to give her the choice.

SPEAKER_01 19:05

Exactly. Yeah. And so, like, that's kind of that's where I lean on that as far as like people saying that, like, oh, he never apologizes, he never, whatever. Like, he acknowledges and he takes accountability for it. I'm giving a little bit of the benefit of the doubt of like contextually where they are. It may not be an I'm sorry, like, especially when we're talking about things that are set in like quote unquote like medieval-esque times. Like, they're gonna say I'm sorry in a really like drawn out, yeah, fucking type of a way. You know what I mean? I was gonna come up with something that sounded really eloquent and cool, but my brain is running on Windows 95.

SPEAKER_00 19:44

His his monologue in uh what chapter 54? I think. Yeah, yeah. That was kind of a big part of that. Taking accountability and being like, hey, this is fucked up. We both went through some stuff, but here's how I've been feeling, and I am gonna tell you now.

SPEAKER_01 19:58

Yeah. So that's that's kind of what I take from it. So I I'm probably definitely biased because I do I do love Reese, but yeah, that's kind of where that comes from. Yeah, we Reese fans over here.

SPEAKER_00 20:13

All right, so let's be honest. The moment that sealed it for most readers, uh the most beautiful place in the world, Valaris. But beyond the grand gestures and wingspan metaphors, here's why Reese and endures as a fandom's favorite. He sees Vera as an equal. He gives her choice, even when it hurts him, values, consent, stand, love him, encourages her to learn to be honest. King behavior. Yes, big, big king behavior. He encourages her to learn to use her powers. He leads with strategy, not ego, uh most of the time. He chooses love without surrendering strength. He is unapologetically emotional, which we love. He cries more than once. We love it. And she doesn't lick away his tears, but does kiss so that's God that ugh that gives me the red flag.

SPEAKER_01 21:06

That's a red flag.

SPEAKER_00 21:08

Don't lick my tears, sir. It also gives Faya the space she needed to come into her own. But Reese isn't perfect. Later books do reveal cracks, especially around secrecy and overprotection. Like uh in a court of silver flames, readers do see a more flawed character. He makes fear-driven choices. And then that evolution matters because Reese isn't a fantasy of perfection. He grows and changes, and he has way more personality than Tamlin. That that he sure fucking does. Actually has a personality. Right. In a genre, once dominated by brooding controlling male leads, Tamlin. Um Reese's redefined the archetype. He didn't tame the heroine, he literally crowned her and made her his equal. Thank you.

SPEAKER_01 21:58

Insert claps here. Yeah. So kind of this is gonna be backtracking a little bit up to our like attachment and things, especially if we like compare Reese and Tamlin and like Is there really a comparison? No. Um, but like when we look at Tamlin, we can see like what I would probably gauge again, based off of what we know, out of context, this is a book. Um, like he ha he definitely has some disorganized attachment. Um, so like not learning to self-soothe emotions, feeling frightened, feeling unsafe, like experiencing abuse as a kid. Um, and then like typically those types of individuals will like replicate that same pattern of abuse. Um and so like I hate to give Tamlin a stage here, especially when it's a resand episode, but um the disorganized attachment is like can find intimate relationships like unsettling, they can swing between emotional extremes of like love and hate, um, they can be insensitive towards their partners, selfish, controlling, untrusting, leading to explosive and abusive behavior, um, things like that. And so textbook. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 23:10

Almost textbook.

SPEAKER_01 23:11

So like we see where, like, again, the differences of like Tamlin and Reese had pretty similar-ish upbringings, maybe not in childhood so much, but like Tamlin's dad's a dick. Reese Ann's dad's a dick.

SPEAKER_00 23:25

Yeah. They were both heirs.

SPEAKER_01 23:27

Uh-huh. They were both heirs.

SPEAKER_00 23:28

Was Tamlin's mom good?

SPEAKER_01 23:30

Was she nice? I don't know if we talked about her a lot or get to know her.

SPEAKER_00 23:34

We don't really see a lot about his mom.

SPEAKER_01 23:36

Okay. Yeah. So we don't really know where that is, but like he probably had some type of a little bit of secure attachment with somebody. Um, but again, we don't know how much mom had, and obviously it wasn't enough.

SPEAKER_00 23:48

He's attached to Lucian.

SPEAKER_01 23:50

Yeah. Um, so yeah, so we can kind of see that like in juxtaposition of they had pretty similar upbringings, they had very similar fathers, they both endured like pretty similar trauma going through the war, things like that. Tamlin turned into a disorganized, attached douchebag, and Reese like learned how to like take care of his emotions and things. So we kind of talk about like nature nurture there too. And like our secure attachment styles are like you have high self-worth and you also see self-worth in other people, you're comfortable expressing emotions and hopes and needs. Um, you have satisfaction with others, you know how to like seek support for yourself and for your partner. Um, and so we can kind of see that with Reese. We don't know a lot about his mom, but we know enough to assume that like she was meeting his emotional needs.

SPEAKER_00 24:41

Um, she helped raise Cass and Az too.

SPEAKER_01 24:44

Exactly. And and like they turned out fairly good well too. Because like Cass and Az both had what I would probably argue worse upbringings than Reese. Like Reese's wasn't good, but it was like theirs was bad. Az's is really bad. So it it that speaks in the in the therapy sense of like how important attachment is to our primary caregivers and like how that can shape who we are as people, how we respond to things, and like how we deal with trauma.

SPEAKER_00 25:12

So whether you love or hate him, Rhysan changed the landscape of romantic. His character even helps him in Avatar as a cultural phenomenon. He became the blueprint for the morally gray but devoted love interest that we've come to know and love. And like the night court itself, he thrives in contrast. Darkness and starlight, power and tenderness, strategy and vulnerability. He's not the villain, but he's also not the savior. He's a high lord who chose to build a better world, even if he had to become a monster to do it.

SPEAKER_01 25:43

Yeah. Uh I think I think that is powerful, because like that's what he did. He did bad things to protect the people that he loved, and that's that's why he's morally grey. You know? That's that's the grayness. So yeah, uh overall impression as the therapist, um, fucking hated him at first. Literally called him a cunt. I was like, he is the worst, and I hate him. What episode does he die in? Um and then like it it really happened like in a progression of like slowly starting to see him do the things that to undo it and like learning more about him and getting to see him vulnerable and all the things, and then I'm like, okay, I like him, but I don't like that I like him. And then I'm like, fine, I like him.

SPEAKER_00 26:26

So yeah, like you said, oh there's one bed. No, no. Oh, oh no.

SPEAKER_01 26:31

Oh, only one. Oh travesty. Um, so yeah, like hated him at first, but he he did a lot of the work to redeem himself. He still definitely has things that he could work on, especially in the in the last book when we see how like the stress and and stuff like related to his mate and his child, like obviously things are coming out there, and we could argue that that's like pretty normal. I was gonna say human, but they're not human, but like that's pretty normal people behavior, um, of like trying to do things to protect people, and we may not do it in the best way that we can. So um, yeah, so still has things to work on, but like definitely fits the morally gray of like doing things to protect the people he loves and doing what he thinks is best, and like trying to maintain that like autonomy and trust and choice. Like he tries to uphold those values and those characteristics a lot, and he apologizes for stuff and takes accountability. And we love a man who does that.

SPEAKER_00 27:38

Oh yes. And that's all for today's episode of Dragons and Diagnoses. So, what do you think? Do Reese's green flags outweigh his red flags? Yes. That was weird. Join us next time as we take a look at our favorite illiterate 19 year old Ferra.

SPEAKER_01 27:59

Yeah. So take care of yourself, do what you can, and we will see you next time in the Therapy Tavern.